Frances Bean Cobain Tributes Father Kurt Cobain On 30th Anniversary Of His Death: 'It Feels Transcendent'

It's been 30 years since Kurt Cobain died, and his only child — his daughter Frances Bean Cobain — took to Instagram on Friday (April 5) to honor her dad and her journey through grief over the course of her life .

“His mom, Wendy, would often press my hands to her cheeks and say, with a sad sadness, 'you've got his hands,'” Frances wrote alongside a series of photos of herself as a child with the Nirvana frontman, as well as baby pictures. of Kurt. “She washed them like it was her only chance to hold him a little closer, frozen in time. I hope she's holding his hands wherever she is. For the past 30 years my ideas around loss have been in a constant state of transformation. The biggest lesson I've learned from grieving for as long as I've been conscious is that it serves a purpose. The duality of life and death, pain and joy, yin and yang, must exist side by side or none of it would make any sense. It is the transitory nature of human existence that plunges us into the depths of our most authentic lives. As it turns out, there is no greater incentive to lean into loving awareness than knowing that everything ends.”

Frances was almost two years old when her father died, so she never had the chance to develop a relationship with him, a point she emphasized in her message on social media. “I wish I could meet my dad. I wish I knew the rhythm of his voice, how he liked his coffee, or how he felt when he put it on after a bedtime story,” she wrote. “I always wondered if he would catch tadpoles with me in the Washington summers or smell like Camel Lights & strawberry nesquik (his favorites, I'm told).”

She ended her post by recalling a letter Kurt wrote her before he was born that read, “Wherever you go or wherever I go, I'll always be with you,” which she says still rings true. “Whether it's listening to a song or through the hands we share, in those moments I get to spend some time with my dad and he feels transcendent,” Frances wrote.

See her full message here.

The grunge icon was discovered in a room above the garage of his Seattle home on April 8, 1994, although investigators later determined that the 27-year-old rock star had died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound three days earlier.