Emmy Russell on Carrying Her Grandma's Legacy Loretta Lynn: “Her Essence Is Literally in My Blood”

Emmy Russell has Vivid memories of her childhood, riding the tour bus with her grandmother—or Meemaw as Russell calls her—Loretta Lynn. Sometimes they would bring her on stage or sing “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” together.

It took years, though, for Russell — who lives in Nashville and recently auditioned American Idol — to finally embrace the “gift” Lynn always said she had.

“All the time, he would say, 'When are you going to come back and do what you were made to do?' says. Rolling rock. He always said, “If you have these gifts, don't bury them under a rug. USE them.'”

During her audition on American Idol, Russell wowed judges Katy Perry, Lionel Richie and Luke Bryan with her performance of an original ballad called “Skinny” about her struggles with an eating disorder. They were also surprised by the fact that she was the granddaughter of a country legend and the daughter of country singer Patsy Lynn.

“I think there's a reason why I think I'm a little shy, and I think it's because I want to own my voice and I want to own it,” she told the judges. “That's why I want to challenge myself and come out here and really come in and say, 'OK, come on, Emmy.'

She did just that on the show, earning props from Perry for her “A+ songwriting” and advancing to the competition. In a new interview, the singer reflects on her love of music, her grandmother's advice and the special moment when Lynn gifted her a guitar at the Ryman Auditorium.

How did you deal with the reaction to your audition?
Sometimes I wake up in the morning and just cry about how grateful I am. The fact that the audition translated to the crowd is powerful to me. I wasn't trying to be anything — I was just being myself, and for that, I'm truly grateful. I didn't try to create a character like I used to. It was just like, “Here I am.” Before I was changing everything, like, oh my god, getting four spray tans a day and not eating any food and putting on a country accent and writing music that I hated — that wasn't for me. It was just all fake.

What was the reaction from your family in general to this set? American Idol dot?
I think they were a little nervous because of how nervous of a person I am, but now they're like, “Shut it up, get up there.” Everyone was saying to me, 'Maybe you shouldn't have auditioned. We don't want you to humiliate yourself.” I just felt this underlying peace. I had so much makeup on, I looked a bit like a clown. I took it all out and said, “Here I am.”

Wow. Would you wear a different outfit?
Everything would be different from what it was. But I really wanted to be seen as myself. I mean, I'm wearing a sweatshirt right now. I am a very comfortable person.

What was it like watching your audition? And are you opening up about your eating disorder with the song?
I said, “Thank you, Emmy, for having the courage to come forward as yourself. Thank you for being brave.” About the music, people have commented that they relate to my song. That means a lot. That's why I make music. At first, it was embarrassing to talk about [the eating disorder], but then I saw it resonate with the world and it's still vulnerable every time I play it. I haven't played it since the audition.

Let's talk about your grandmother, Loretta Lynn. Was this information something you always planned to keep?
It was my childhood. If my dad is a doctor and I grew up as a doctor, you would say your father is a doctor. So for me, that's my normal. I didn't know Katy Perry was going to find out who Loretta was because she's an older artist. I think I'm still in awe of how awesome Meemaw is. I call her Meemaw. They didn't get that on camera, but Katy Perry shook my hand and said, “That's so cool.”

What would your grandmother say about auditioning for this show?
I think he would be like, “Thank you, honey. If you are going to use your gifts, I am happy. Please use them.” She was always very angry with me. I was a missionary for five, six years, and every time I came back from Brazil, she would say, “When are you going to come back and do what you were made to do?”

Wow. Did he always know you had this gift?
Yes. When I was 15, she let me down with her guitar at the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville. “You're the only one I feel should carry this.” But at 15 you don't know how to carry such a heavy weight. And so my process was interesting. My musical journey has been very interesting in learning how to carry it properly instead of letting it crush me.

Do you feel it's a responsibility though?
I accept. Meemaw gave me this guitar so there's something to it. He saw something in me and has a lot of grandchildren who sing, so there must be something there. I've always written, I've always been a creative person, and so maybe there's a legacy there that I can carry, but in a different way than I thought. I thought I had to be just like her. I feel like I'm more like her than when I was trying to be like her.

Her essence is literally in my blood. And so it is, what if our same thing is confessional truth? What if I'm not as country as she is? What if we don't sing about the same things but still be honest in our songs?

Was there any other advice to share?
God, he always said, “God doesn't give a plumber tools he won't use.” Some things are probably a little too inappropriate for this discussion. It said: “Don't wear dresses that are too tight. Or they'll say something they don't want to.” She was so funny. He thought I wrote like a 40-year-old woman.

You mentioned that you have been a missionary for five or six years. Have you put it aside?
I hope I can do it all. I hope I can become a singer. I hope I can travel the world and serve in any way I can. I think everything will be a part of me. God, who do you say I am? I know I am wanted and loved. I am love. It's just my moral compass. I will always carry that compass inside, even if I am in LA with all this pressure.

What did you learn about Lynn's performances and music?
He would communicate with the crowd. As she was on stage, someone said, “I love you, Loretta.” And he would say, “I love you too, honey.” There was just a conversation, the whole show, always a conversation. It wasn't like I was talking to you, like you were sitting across from her. He would turn to them and say, “They want to hear 'Don't Come Home With a Drink.' Hit it.” He would perform for the audience.

What can we expect from you during American IdolHollywood Week?
There are many conquests. I'm a nervous person, so getting there is anxious, fighting it. I sang a very personal song called “Like That” on the guitar. I was really nervous playing this one, but I'm trying to get a little more into it. You will just see a slow gradient. I will get a little stronger.