Johann Vera On Coming Out With 'Closet': 'I Want To Be As Honest As I Can'

After gaining momentum as a finalist on a music competition show La Banda (where CNCO was born) and later won its first Bulletin board debuting with his debut single “Pretty Girl (Tu Cancion)” in 2016, Johann Vera is entering a new era in his solo career — one fueled by authenticity and transparency.

Last month, the bilingual Ecuadorian-born pop artist released “Closet,” a brooding, powerful ballad — where, for the first time, he speaks his truth: “Why would I hate and fight with myself just because do I love differently? / How can a parent decide to lose a child just because they love differently?” he sings in the heartfelt lyrics, “I ain't gonna change for no one else.”

“It took me two years, but it pushed me to be honest and open with myself,” says Vera Bulletin board of coming out as queer. “[My previously-released single] “Cielo” talks about that first meeting and discovering this new side of freedom and happiness and being more true to my sexuality. The “cupboard” is about acceptance. I want to be as honest as I can.”

“Cielo” and “Closet” are part of Vera's upcoming six-part EP dubbed Nada Importa En Verdad (Nothing Really Matters). “It's about the struggles and the ups and downs. Yes, I'm in love, but I still have all these issues.”

In an interview with Bulletin boardthe indie Latin artist talks about his coming out process, dealing with family rejection and finding his purpose, thanks to his new single.

What was the dating process like and why was that moment for you?

It was terrifying. I realized now that all my life I had this idea that sexuality should not be touched in my music or my art. I wanted to be a private artist and not talk about my personal life. It's not that I wasn't honest — but there was always a filter, even on my social media, that was very edited and posed.

When I started therapy, almost three years ago, I began to realize many things about how I handle life. Growing up with my family, I got along with everyone and never had an issue, but I would hold back a lot of things. I wrote this song before I talked to my parents. With the family, it was a difficult part – because coming from Ecuador, I would see their perspective on the LGBTQ community – so I always had that fear.

You mention living in fear and filter, but can you take us back to how you felt the day “Closet” was born?

A few years ago, I wrote a letter to little Johann and that night I had a writing session. Some words I started writing triggered me. I was with girls and I loved them, but at that point in my life, I had already been with a guy for a year. I continued to write the song, but I was struggling. So I took a break, talked to my songwriter and producer about how I was feeling, and “Closet” was born in 30 minutes. I didn't want to continue living like this. I had a big moment of realization.

It's a beautiful song, but also super personal and very vulnerable.

I wrote the song so that everyone can understand the struggle. Throughout your life, you feel that you have this flaw, deep down you felt that there was a problem. It is very difficult to break this barrier. Now it is changing, but it is still, even more so on the Latin side, not very acceptable. The song was done and it was therapy for me. I had no plans to release it, but after seeing how my close friends and colleagues began to react, I felt I had to.

You wrote this song before you told your parents you were queer. How is your relationship with them today?

Still not good. I told them two years ago on Christmas day, I had no expectations, but I invited them to therapy. However, there were no talks after that and it disconnected them even more. Now it's not even a “How are you?” Before, I was the pride of the family – Viña del Mar, all the awards – and now, they feel like they lost a son. It's tough.

They were also clear and vocal about not supporting my new single “Closet”. Their side of the story is that I influence people to do something wrong. I couldn't fight anymore. But now I know it happened that way for a reason, and [my story] helps people feel they are not alone. It's 2024, but obviously, we still have to have these conversations.

Your friends and colleagues have been very supportive.

Mau & Ricky came to my defense and called me when the song came out to tell me that God loves me. I cried so much. Lele Pons and Guaynaa also came. I am very blessed. After the song was released, I was locked in my childhood room… I stayed there. The amount of messages and love that started coming through DMs really helped me. The first couple of nights, I couldn't sleep — but it was so beautiful to go into my DMs and see how strangers were connecting to the song. The result is crazy. Even though all this is happening, I feel very happy. I am proud.

What do you expect your music to be like moving forward?

I just want to make music with a purpose. I want to be more honest on this side. If I fall in love with a guy, I'll sing about it, but it's more of a purpose. I feel that I can make an impact when I talk about different topics. Through this whole process, I want to be transparent and truthful. You realize in music how important authenticity is. It's really about connection.