John Oliver to Clarence Thomas: Drive away from SCOTUS in a new $2.4 million motor coach!

Comedian John Oliver offers Clarence Thomas $1 million a year and a luxury coach to resign his Supreme Court seat.

The wild — and Oliver claims, “kind of legit” — offer came at the end of the season 11 premiere of Last week tonightthe long-running HBO sitcom.

Oliver spent much of the show mocking the corruption of the Supreme Court. Investigations in recent months—most notably, painstaking reporting by ProPublica—have revealed that conservative justices are living high thanks to the protection of right-wing billionaires, many of whom have interests in cases before the nation's highest court.

Thomas is not alone in receiving gifts. Justice Samuel Alito, for example, traveled to a luxurious fishing village in Alaska with a controversial hedge fund executive, where he dined on crab legs and drank $1,000 worth of wine. Alito reportedly did not disclose the vacation — or the luxury private jet flight that took him from Alaska — as a gift.

But as Oliver explained, Thomas is alone in a category that receives lavish perks, travel and entertainment from billionaire patrons — including dozens of destination vacations and private jet flights, as well as myriad VIP tickets to sporting events. Thomas allegedly accepted many of these gifts without disclosing them in annual filings, treating them as personal hospitality between friends.

Thomas is also the famous owner of a 40-foot motor coach — think a tour bus decked out as a luxury RV. But instead of buying the yacht land himself, Thomas reportedly took out a loan from another wealthy benefactor for the purchase price of nearly a quarter of a million dollars. As congressional documents I have revealed, this person collected interest payments from Thomas for a while, but eventually forgave the debt, effectively giving the RV to Thomas. “It's honestly starting to feel like Thomas doesn't have friends so much as human ATMs,” Oliver snarled.

The HBO host then wondered aloud what it would be like if Thomas could enjoy the lavish lifestyle he so clearly aspires to without all the hard work of carrying water for billionaire interests at the Supreme Court. “Justice Thomas we have a special offer for you tonight,” said Oliver. “We are prepared to offer you $1 million a year — for the rest of your life — if you leave the Supreme Court immediately and never come back!”

Oliver held up a legal contract and insisted, “This is no joke! A million dollars a year until you—or I—die.” The host insisted that legal experts assured him that under the court's ethics framework (or lack thereof) the illegal bid was in fact legal. (Oliver added that HBO isn't giving the money, but that, “personally, I'm ready.”)

Thomas now has 30 days to make a decision. And to sweeten the pot, Oliver offered the hard-nosed judge a brand new “coach on wheels” — a $2.4 million motorcycle with a king bed, 1.5 bathrooms, a “fucking fireplace,” four TVs and a full-size refrigerator. residence. The deal is simple, the comedian said: “All you have to do in return is sign the contract and get out of the Supreme Court.”

Seeking to reassure Thomas, Oliver insisted that his billionaire friends of justice would not abandon him if he accepted the offer and decided to resign. Certainly, the lavish hospitality of Thomas's bigots would not dry up, simply because he no longer had the power to make legal decisions that could help them keep their money or advance their narrow political and ideological interests.

“That's the beauty of friendship, Clarence,” Oliver insisted. “If they're real friends, they'll love you no matter what your job is.”